Talk:Dylan Schwartz

Hi Dylan,

I thoroughly enjoyed reading your page. To start, I thought your preface section brought up some very interesting points that I had not thought about when creating my page. I think it is a very good way to introduce the topic of identity analysis without jumping directly into your own personal information. This introductory paragraph immediately hooked me and piqued my interest. Moving into your personal data identity, I liked how you did not initially specify how the information applies to you, such as if it is accurate or not. You simply laid out the information that the data broker report returned about you and the information that the google search returned. By doing so, it is easy as a reader to see how much contrasting information there is about you.

In your revision I think you could do more to connect your data profile with the content of the class. You could do so by stating some of the articles we read that could help you strengthen some of the points you are trying to make. Since you found that much of the information that is posted online about you is inaccurate, you could possibly include some information from the Frankfurt reading on bullshit. I also think it would be a good idea to discuss possible ethical problems or oversights that may be caused by highly detailed or inaccurate online data profiles. Overall, you have a great foundation with your draft and are definitely on track to have a great final product after revision!

-Kyle Gericke