Talk:John Voorhess
I think you did an excellent job assessing your online identity. It’s interesting that the four different social networks you used align with different phases of your life. In your 2002 and 2005 sections, I like that you comment on how you intentionally presented yourself based on something you strived to become, even if it was unrealistic. Your story about the possible implications involved with having pictures of guns is an excellent example that provides insight into your logic and decision-making.
Overall, your article is a fun and easy read that flows very well. I didn’t find any grammatical errors. You provide pictures that give a great visual representation and context for each section. My only suggestion would be to change the perspective to first-person. Since it’s a very personal piece, it might make more sense to reword it that way. Try it out and see if it sounds better to you.
- Joshua Walker
Corina
Excellent piece, John!
Using the 3rd person allows you a greater degree of objectivity and encourages the reader to trust your self-assessment.
You bring up an interesting point, that of revision/re-imagining the online self/identity through deletion. How could you develop this segment and/or contrasted with the practice of selective posting that developed later?
Joshua's first comment above is highly relevant and I encourage you to consider it fully for the revision.
All best,
Corina
Response to Corina
Thank you.
I experimented with changing the entire document to first person, but I felt that it was too personal and I agreed with your statement regarding objectivity. In the end, I decided to leave the persona analysis in third person perspective and shift the personal statements to first person. I don't usually like to mix things like this, but this exercise is also a unique shift in introspection that I don't usually do. I've also added a section that I feel addresses both your and Josh's comments about identity revision, as this is something that we all continuously do in real life and something that I've been working on in internet life.
Best,
John
