Talk:George Lu
Comment #1:
Hello George!
Great job with your avatar autobiography! I really liked how you made a distinction between two major themes; audience & authenticity. The section about your content shifting as you became more aware of your audience ties in really great with the reading and also represents changes in who your perceived audience is. The tone you used also really reflects your personality and I like how accessible your content is!
Personally, I would really suggest that you tease out the section "Profile Pictures". I think it has a lot of potential for analysis! I think you bring up a really interesting point about "first impression" through the profile picture. It speaks to the theme of authenticity and clearly you argue that it does not entirely capture who you are. Why does the profile picture carry so much meaning and what gets lost when having a profile picture? Similarly, I think it would be great to see you have more discussion in "Other parts of me". Just keeping in mind what Prof. Conway said, try going beyond summarizing. You have clearly worked really hard on this and it was a pleasure to read! I appreciate how you really emphasized your argument that Facebook cannot replace face-to-face interactions and represents only a subsection of who you are. For your revisions, I would just suggest building off of those themes a bit more!
Otherwise it all looks great, layout and content!
-Meera
Comment #2:
George-
Great organization and structure overall. I loved the language and the commentary on your pictures. I love how you describe your facebook journey, like you're telling a story and adding other people's comments, and opinions. I really enjoy the 'initial impression' section, and how you structured your analysis on a parallel of someone getting to know you, which is creative and cool, especially because it is just like friending you on facebook when you first got it, and watching you grow, post embarrassing things, and discover new features. You are allowing me to view as if i am physically on your page. I would have loved to see some of your old profile pictures, the cartoons and memes, and some of your old posts if you want to add more detail about your younger self's experience on facebook. I see your strive to highlight the importance of yourself today though, so this isn't completely necessary, but I think it would add strength and content to your 'initial impressions' section if you so choose.
I would also like to see more content in 'what i care about'. I understand that you want to keep your facebook profile sparse, but maybe adding something like your recent trip back to CA with Nicole and say how where you live, and your family is an important thing to share, again if you want to add more content. I do like how you are choosing not to share a good amount to mirror what you share on FB, but being your friend on facebook, I can say by stalking many old photos of you, I have learned much on what other people post about you. Something small you might want to add a paragraph on!
Overall great personality and presentation.
Hailey
