Talk:Chancellor Evans
Jonathan Timma: Overall I thought your autobiography was good. I liked that you shared some personal information about yourself and how that affects what you do/don't do on Facebook (which is accurate). My only criticism would be that in the Ethical Acculturation section. The beginning didn't feel "autobiographic". You stated Professor Conway and what we talked about in class as if the entire world knows Professor Conway is and what we talked about in that lecture. Granted, our class can see this, but to make it more "autobiographical" I would have said something to the extent of "I had a professor named Paul Conway and in one of his lectures we talked about X, Y and Z...". Other than that I thought it was good.
Your post seems genuine, especially given how much information you shared. You definitely addressed the assignment by attacking the 3 topics and ethical acculturation directly but I wish you had addressed more of the elements of Facebook. I realize this might be hard to do given that your profile is one that isn't particularly active. I gather that you don't upload tons of photos and share what you're thinking all the time but I think there's value in creating a section for those elements of Facebook you think represent who are well and those that don't. If you're not one to use all the elements of Facebook, perhaps you should share why you don't find them useful or why they wouldn't represent you well even if you did use them. Overall, I think more of a connection with your Facebook profile could improve your post.
The structure seems very assignment-catered. There isn't a problem with this, and you definitely share personal information within the text, but I'd change the names of your sections if you're going this route. Someone who opens your post for the first time and glances at the headings (Ethical Acculturation, Authenticity, Embodiment, Temporality) might not even know this article is about you and your Facebook identity. Obviously other students know, but if this Wiki was public, it might get misinterpreted by the reader immediately. There are a few grammatical errors but this is to be expected given the conversational tone in which you address your post. I actually enjoy reading the first-person posts since they seem more personal so I like the style you chose to write in.
Aaron Medacco
