Talk:Qhoe Yun

Qhoe, this was a really unique post. The flow was logical, starting with an introduction of your moral beliefs, a search of your online identity, an evaluation of your beliefs, and greater moral implications. It was interesting how you adopted the perspective of John Doe because it gives a glimpse of what the reader would find if he or she were to look you up. It sounds like you did a comprehensive search, and I like how you used these results to greater inform how they influence your moral beliefs around data and privacy.

For your revision, I think you could improve by talking more about your data broker report (if you got one) and doing some more searches beyond social media. Social media is often something we can control, so it'd be interesting to see what information is out there that you didn't expect to find and how that might change your views. You make a point about how easy it is to craft a persona on someone based on gathering information from their social media profiles, but what about the information that lies beyond these websites? Does that information change your view about the price users pay to use the Internet?

The last section on perfect information is a good start, but it's a little unclear what your argument is and how it is relevant to the rest of your post at large. I like how your bring in an ethical discussion and clearly back it up with support, but I think the connection between the moral argument and the rest of your piece needs some more clarity. I'd also recommend giving your final revision a proof read as there were some typos and grammatical errors. Good job overall!

-Evon Yao

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