Talk:Joanne Orozco

Andrew Rabines

I would first like to say well done, this was a pretty easy read and was well written overall. I noticed you originally write from the third-person point of view and then switch in and our with first person, this is fine but maybe stick to one to make if flow better. The presentation and format of your discoveries if very well written and interesting. The paper carries a serious tone which is good, in the conclusion I feel like you could have talked about the connection between your online identity and true identity a bit more. The use of class readings is good but might be able to be toned down or spread out more in the paper than in just the conclusion. I like the images used -might want to blur out your neighborhood name if you're worried about that- but I think one could be moved further up in the paper to draw the reader's attention. Overall good start!

Priyanka Khetarpal

Hi Joanne! You did a great job overall and I really enjoyed learning more about you and your experience with this assignment. 

From an organizational standpoint you did a wonderful job sectioning off your blog post into sections that provide insight and build upon your overall argument. The tone of your blog post was also a good balance between scholarly and conversational which gave insight into your personality

and voice. Within the results section of your blog post you bring up a very interesting point about your data not just belonging to you, but the public as 

well. Structurally, I think if you introduce this idea earlier on in your post, it can be developed a part of your thesis statement. Additionally, you do a great job of connecting this to Florida's notion of privacy definitions being contingent on the individual.