Talk:Jay Dayal

Ben Rogers

Jay, I was surprised by how little information is out there about you, as you do not have a common name. A couple things I was thinking about while reading your article is that it would be helpful if some information was broken up, such as the Data Broker portion. I suggest breaking this into a separate section from the section "What Comes Up On Google." Furthermore, I was confused if the databrokers didn't provide any information whatsoever, even a bare skeleton report of the information Paul gave them (excuse me, as I had quite an extensive report, and am surprised that they didn't even try creating one)? Your social media portion was quite descriptive, good work. I would like to know what are your privacy details on social media? Lastly, as you need to add reading requirements from class, I recommend the Dan Cocking chapter about building our online presence, and how sharing information is us constructing our digital image, while maintaining a source of privacy. Overall great work!

Steven Allred

Jay, Your article was enjoyable to read. I liked how you started off with the question "Who am I?" and followed up with a brief summary of your search for this question and how that search ended up, this introduction gave a short summary of what would be covered in your article while remaining brief. I found it interesting how you used the lack of information available on yourself to answer this question while also explaining thoroughly why there might be a lack of information about yourself. I believe that your wiki did a good job of taking the reader through your search for the question you began with and doing the assignment this way made the wiki a good narrative. As far as revision possibilities, it may be a good idea to possibly go into a bit of detail on possible implications of the lack of information about you online if any exist. I believe the best advice I can give on the substance of your article is to keep in mind that for the final draft you should try to connect it to the class material in some way. As far as formatting goes, I believe it might make your page look nicer if you possibly rearranged the images you have on the page. For example I think spreading them out a bit more and possibly having one towards the introduction of your article may be a good idea. Also with the different sections you have on the page a possible common wiki style table of contents may also improve your page.

- Steven Allred