Difference between revisions of "Talk:Ibrahim Rasheed"
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| − | + | Thanks for including the “how-to” portion at the top of your autobiography. That made it easier for me as a reader to understand your intent as a writer. Your section on LinkedIn was very interesting because I was able to understand from this portion of the autobiography what is important to you. I wonder, is your placement of this section at the top deliberate? I gathered that this identity is the most salient of your online identities. I liked the contrast of more formal LinkedIn you and more casual Instagram which seems to be more friendly and warm. Your Twitter felt a peak into your mind with stream-of-consciousness posts and random thoughts. Overall I really liked your post as you compared how you portray yourself on these different platforms. I saw changes in what you reveal and why (formalness of setting) and how you connect with others (recruiters on LinkedIn and friends on Instagram and Twitter). One thing I am still curious about is how these identities connect to in-real-life Ibrahim? What does he think of himself? Kinda meta but still... | |
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| + | Grammar/spelling comments: | ||
| + | “Ibrahim volunteered at a refugee center, which is doubtful he did for his career;” -this portion of the sentence in your LinkedIn section sounds a bit awkward. Maybe rephrase the second half a bit? | ||
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| + | “Lastly, I checked his LinkedIn activity. There’s very little to see.” -in this sentence from the LinkedIn section you randomly switched from 3rd to 1st person. | ||
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| + | “It must be because he’s build college relationships on other platforms and Twitter is high school/hometown people.” -there is a grammar mistake in this sentence from your Twitter section. | ||
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| + | ---Rebecca | ||
Currently editing - Graham Eger | Currently editing - Graham Eger | ||
Revision as of 23:05, 21 February 2018
Thanks for including the “how-to” portion at the top of your autobiography. That made it easier for me as a reader to understand your intent as a writer. Your section on LinkedIn was very interesting because I was able to understand from this portion of the autobiography what is important to you. I wonder, is your placement of this section at the top deliberate? I gathered that this identity is the most salient of your online identities. I liked the contrast of more formal LinkedIn you and more casual Instagram which seems to be more friendly and warm. Your Twitter felt a peak into your mind with stream-of-consciousness posts and random thoughts. Overall I really liked your post as you compared how you portray yourself on these different platforms. I saw changes in what you reveal and why (formalness of setting) and how you connect with others (recruiters on LinkedIn and friends on Instagram and Twitter). One thing I am still curious about is how these identities connect to in-real-life Ibrahim? What does he think of himself? Kinda meta but still...
Grammar/spelling comments: “Ibrahim volunteered at a refugee center, which is doubtful he did for his career;” -this portion of the sentence in your LinkedIn section sounds a bit awkward. Maybe rephrase the second half a bit?
“Lastly, I checked his LinkedIn activity. There’s very little to see.” -in this sentence from the LinkedIn section you randomly switched from 3rd to 1st person.
“It must be because he’s build college relationships on other platforms and Twitter is high school/hometown people.” -there is a grammar mistake in this sentence from your Twitter section.
---Rebecca
Currently editing - Graham Eger
