Difference between revisions of "Talk:Alex Ridener"

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Your autobiography is very interesting. I enjoyed the progression of your Facebook page that this story walked me through. To improve your autobiography, I want to learn more about what is on your page now. I believe if you include some pictures of your page it would strengthen your claim. Similarly, to how you describe not having a social media presence as putting you behind the 8-ball, you talk about competitors having perfectly curated photos. What photos of yourself have you chosen to include on your Facebook page to make you a competitive contender for job opportunities through your Facebook profile? Also, since you discuss why it is so important to have a social media presence in the recruiting process, I urge you to push your thinking further as to other reasons this is important. One thing that immediately comes to my mind is that many job opportunities are found through one's weak ties on one's social media. You could incorporate outside sources that support this or another claim of similar nature. This would strengthen your argument by showing support for your claim. Good luck on your revision!
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Your autobiography is very interesting. I enjoyed the progression of your Facebook page that this story walked me through. You start very generally with lots of facts. try to include a story or something to hook the reader in. To improve your autobiography, I want to learn more about what is on your page now. I believe if you include some pictures of your page it would strengthen your claim. Similarly, to how you describe not having a social media presence as putting you behind the 8-ball, you talk about competitors having perfectly curated photos. What photos of yourself have you chosen to include on your Facebook page to make you a competitive contender for job opportunities through your Facebook profile? Also, since you discuss why it is so important to have a social media presence in the recruiting process, I urge you to push your thinking further as to other reasons this is important. One thing that immediately comes to my mind is that many job opportunities are found through one's weak ties on one's social media. You could incorporate outside sources that support this or another claim of similar nature. This would strengthen your argument by showing support for your claim. Overall, I thought your structure was great and really appreciated the headings. Good luck on your revision!
 
--Cami Johnson
 
--Cami Johnson

Revision as of 20:30, 21 February 2018

"Your progression with your use of Facebook was really interesting. When you started your post, I noticed you talked a lot about the history of Facebook (and Myspace) as platforms, but I think your wiki would benefit from more information about your history with Facebook and Myspace; the reader knows these historical details. Your post read more like an autobiography of social media instead of an autobiography of your social media usage. When you revise, you should think about what readers are learning about you through your Facebook usage. On the other hand, I really like your analysis of your behavior, especially about how the lack of social norms on early Facebook influenced your early Internet usage and allowed you to act in non-target ways. Especially, as the target audience for the site changed with time. I think that would be interesting to elaborate and write further analysis on. Additionally, I think you should make use of the wiki-style headings and make the headings more accurately describe your Facebook behavior. (ex. “trolling days”, “Facebook group days”, etc.) Also, I think your comment about the being a bystander is really insightful, and you include some analysis related to course readings and materials. As you edit, ask yourself: how much can a reader tell about you from the profile, is it correct?"

-- Chalse Okorom


Your autobiography is very interesting. I enjoyed the progression of your Facebook page that this story walked me through. You start very generally with lots of facts. try to include a story or something to hook the reader in. To improve your autobiography, I want to learn more about what is on your page now. I believe if you include some pictures of your page it would strengthen your claim. Similarly, to how you describe not having a social media presence as putting you behind the 8-ball, you talk about competitors having perfectly curated photos. What photos of yourself have you chosen to include on your Facebook page to make you a competitive contender for job opportunities through your Facebook profile? Also, since you discuss why it is so important to have a social media presence in the recruiting process, I urge you to push your thinking further as to other reasons this is important. One thing that immediately comes to my mind is that many job opportunities are found through one's weak ties on one's social media. You could incorporate outside sources that support this or another claim of similar nature. This would strengthen your argument by showing support for your claim. Overall, I thought your structure was great and really appreciated the headings. Good luck on your revision! --Cami Johnson