Talk:Fred Durham

First thing first, I really enjoyed the intro. I got all of the references that you dropped in there, so I found it quite amusing. However, I don't know how someone who doesn't know the things you mentioned would feel. Probably lost, or even just close the page. I feel like it was a very unique way to start. I think what made this so interesting is it gives you a perspective on someone who isn't really into to social media at all. I know a couple friends, who are exactly the same way. I feel as though a section about your current use of social media, would be beneficial. Maybe a brief section of like your current Facebook profile you've made. I also like the flow of the piece. Considering you don't use social media much at all, I feel this was a spectacular job at making a good assignment from not much material to work with. Thank you for sharing it, and good luck with revisions.- Vincent Rogers

Upon first reading your intro, I was just as confused as you mentioned I would be in the second paragraph following it. However I think this bold choice of style paid off and it drew me into your article before I had even finished the first few sentences. And while sometimes this approach can often leave the reader feeling confused on how it ties in to the rest of your story, I think it made perfect sense given that you rarely use Facebook now, and that first identity you created aligns with your current beliefs of social media.

When actually talking about your presence on Facebook, I would maybe think about adding more analysis on why you do not do certain things on it, such as posting statuses or photos. While you alluded to several points on why you do not use it including the fact that you prefer creating offline relationships, I think there is room to dive a bit deeper into the specifics of your online usage.

Furthermore, I think you chose a great photo to show at the beginning of the piece, but it would not hurt to maybe add one or two more displaying what your profile currently looks like even if it is low on content.

The overall flow of the post made sense though and I think it was the right call to use a more chronologically-based outline then jumping back and forth. For your revision I would work on adding more specifics to your actual Facebook usage, even if there is not much to pinpoint, and you could also add a few more ideas from the readings to supplement your personal findings.

-Julien Childress