Talk:Allan Chen
Comment #1:
Hey Allan,
Be prepared for feedback~! I will try my best, it will be in chronological order as I read it. First impressions are that I really like your profile infobox! It is nice and the caption is hilarious. Your introduction paragraph is very refreshing and introduces the concern about ethics in Facebook profiles.
The Beginnings screenshot is something that reminds me of my past as well. The introduction to your analysis on Facebook allows for an easy read that users can enjoy. This sentiment goes for the Intervention part of your page as well.
"Who Am I Now?" was something I was surprisingly pleased with. You explicitly tied in the themes within each subsection. I can see that there is a driving theme of authenticity and reservation in what you post and do on Facebook. Self-representation is also a big part of your writing, perhaps dive more into your intentions per subsection? You can add more substance within the subsections if you tie some of the themes from the Virtually Me reading rather than put it under your conclusion section. I prefer the conclusion be the conclusion of the article rather than the analysis on the reasons why you did your actions. Perhaps you could change the section from "Conclusions" to "Analysis" if you do not want to add more reasoning and detail in the "Who Am I Now?"
The autobiography is structured more as a research paper than a writing. Try to create a story like how you did the Beginnings and Intervention sections! It was genuinely a wonderful read as it shows your cheekiness, explicit ties to the themes and readings, and because of the visuals. Let me know if you need any details or clarifications on my comment/feedback, I am more than happy to oblige.
Best, Cecilia
Comment #2:
