Talk:Brant Verlinde

Hey Brant- really nice job with this assignment. First, I think your article could benefit from an introduction paragraph of some kind so you can state a thesis or some overall pattern that you observed as you were looking through your search results. You do a great job of summarizing your identity in the "Google Identity" and "Deeper Search Results" sections, but it would be useful if you had a topic sentence or even some question that could be answered. I specifically enjoyed the section on the deeper results that you found. I know a lot of people tend to just look at the first few pages because the Google algorithm will show the most popular results, but the websites on those later pages can be really scary. Your last paragraph was really interesting. I honestly had no idea that you could visit that website and see what kind of information Google has on you. It's definitely wild to think about how well Google knows us. Again, I think having a thesis/topic would help your overall article because you would be able to relate your paragraphs back to that thesis/topic. All of your paragraphs are really good and detailed, but having an introduction paragraph with a thesis would make your overall article much stronger. It could also be beneficial to add some citations. Maybe look at some articles from class and try to relate those to your paragraphs. In general, really good job.

Comment from Mahir Piyarali - Hi Brant! First of all, I like how you've focused your piece on searching and search results. I also like how your first part of your Google Identity portion talks about how you were surprised about the vast amount of information available about you. However, I think your piece could benefit from some more commentary on this. You have the start nailed down, but as a reader I feel left wanting to know more about your personal feelings on the matter. On that note, it's nice being told what you can see, but add some screenshots (maybe blurred from super personal info?)! It would really round out your piece, and give readers a sense of what it looks like to search for you. I also really like how you discuss your deeper search results, including the anecdote about Russian sinkhole! But, again, some visuals would make that portion even stronger. Finally, I think your piece could use a little more reflection. You start talking about some points around how this availability of data makes you feel, but I'm left wanting more. In all, I enjoyed reading your piece and look forward to the finished product!